Feverish with Insanity

2005-03-29T17:28:00.000-08:00

How interesting. I relive this blog. But I'm not as angsty anymore.Hmm... Lately, I've been lounging in the US, nothing new. I got up a bit early today, a steady sign of my adjustment to the new timeline. I'll update this. ^^ Maybe later tonight.

2003-08-20T22:37:00.000-07:00

LAST MONTH'S POSTS: I am resting since I have tonsilities. The fever is rising and my muscles are screaming in pain. I have been quite active since Friday and it prolly schocked my exercise-lacking body. I wasn't made for this. And now, I am suffering an excruciating consequence. My right knee is bruised. Augh. It looks black with all the blood trapped in there. Hm. Last week, a friend of mine

2003-07-07T03:11:00.000-07:00

THESE POSTS ARE FOR LAST WEEK: Minutes ago, I was in my old school and was talking to my teacher. That teacher used to despise me because I was entirely different my classmates. I was a loner and naive. But now, I was welcomed with surprising warmth. A warmth I had always thought, was meant for others. Two of my batchmates saw me in uniform and were utterly biting back the laughter that was

2003-06-29T04:54:00.000-07:00

There. Finished tweaking. I'll upload my stories by next week. Sempai, I've linked up your Hey Mr. Tambourine Man thingie. I thought it's good enough for the public. Ciao. Love you all.

2003-06-29T04:40:00.000-07:00

I'm trying to fix this. Blogger isn't working well. *whacks Blogger with universal mallet* Thank you Akane.

2003-06-25T02:21:00.000-07:00

For yesterday's blog: Earlier today, I found myself worrying about my father. When I was about to leave for the school, I saw him wrapped tightly in a blanket. I got worried because when I called him, he didn't wake. My father was a very light sleeper. And he doesn't use a blanket. After that, I met with an old friend and settled matters with my broken heart. By the gods, he once again took me

2003-06-23T05:46:00.000-07:00

I certainly don't understand as to why I am feeling so down today. I've deliberately tried to get myself to like my dad but he's really not helping it. The first week of college has been quite rough. But I kinda like it. As for some people who have been completely ignoring me, I guess I'm taking a time off. I'm closing all doors and windows and will now live in solitude. No time for that

2003-06-19T04:04:00.000-07:00

What's Your Outlook on Life? brought to you by Quizilla One quizzy. Good night.

2003-06-18T02:29:00.000-07:00

Hmm... I'm tired after school... I'm kinda dizzy too. Yesterday, we were given an assignment and I spent the whole day in the library, looking for it with my classmates. Gawd... if this is just an assignment, what more with a project!? *sigh* My head is aching. My feet hurt. The heels are really killing me. *sighs again* I've met a lot of friends already. And it seems to me I'll be seeing all

2003-06-16T02:41:00.000-07:00

I am currently in an internet cafe and waiting for my friend to give me his sked. Hmm... It's pretty quiet here. First day of school today and all we had were pretty much speeches about the lousy regulation and also some perks about being Paulinian. And a nurse. I never did understand the real reason why I took that damned course. Prolly cause my mom was pushing me up the wall about it. And

2003-06-13T05:45:00.000-07:00

I feel so goddamn fucking cynical. Hmph. No one loves me. Fuck it all.

2003-06-11T23:08:00.000-07:00

Two days ago, I met with my "brother", Kuya Emman (haha special mention). He helped me go through what some people may say is, a phase in life. One which is extremely difficult for the ones who are so used to being loved with an intensity. We talked, drank coffee(gawd, so much like adults) and also talked. I'm very happy right now. For a number of reasons actually. Reason #1: I met my oniichan

2003-06-11T06:13:00.000-07:00

I'm quiz happy again. Which Harry Potter Marauder Are You? What's that? Anyone have an idea? Armand What Anne Rice vampire would you be? brought to you by Quizilla LOL Armand!? hhahaha Antonio Banderas. Kewl. Your an ice spirit. Your very deep in your ownways, and very intellectual. Although somepeople may define you as crazy. You usuallylike to be alone and probably only have a fewclose

2003-06-08T00:29:00.000-07:00

It is Sunday morning and I came home from church early. I had to go. I can't hold on to my tears much longer. Last night, my... he came home from his province and wanted to talk. I was so delighted to hear from him. But when I said that I loved him, he didn't reply. It was then that I realized, something in him has changed. There was some other voice singing along his, telling me that something

2003-06-05T18:30:00.000-07:00

My parents brought me to an ophthalmologist earlier today. After examining me, he said I have astigmatism and I don't need to wear glasses. YAHOOOOOOO!!! The best news I've heard all day. PhiRO is online and running so I've got plenty to do. : ) As of now, I'm listening to the background music of Ragnarok Online. It's beautiful. Mesmerzing. AND FREE. I love that part. It's free of charge.

2003-06-03T18:54:00.000-07:00

It is night again and I have done nothing productive all throughout the day. I haven't found myself as a productive being. It is true, I dwell upon the same things all the time. It is true that I have done naught to help myself. I've been trying to do some papier tole but my hands are shaking. I'm trying some office work but my eyes aren't helping. And my parents refuse to take me to the eye

2003-06-03T05:25:00.000-07:00

Anthy. You are Anthy, the quiet and mysterious RoseBride. You like doing things for others, butyou sometimes feel trapped within the world'scage. And if your prince doesn't show up tosave you, you might have to learn to break outon your own. Freedom is worth every drop of blood it takes toget there. Which Revolutionary Girl Utena Character Are You? brought to you by Quizilla This is kinda

2003-06-03T05:22:00.000-07:00

You're Fuuma! Which Clamp X Angel Are You? brought to you by Quizilla Oh-kay... Wasn't I supposed be the other way around?

2003-06-03T05:18:00.000-07:00

You are maroon. You represent cunning stength, but usually a manipulative power evolves from it. You are vengeful and impure, and have nearly lost all hope at become beautiful inside again. What inner color are you? WHAT IN THE THREE WORLDS!?!??? T_T *gets really freaked out* Goddess of the Moon. Beauty, yet a sadness lurksabout you at times. But hey, pain is beauty,right? What element

2003-06-03T05:10:00.000-07:00

Ooohh... quiz happy. Prissy Leoglas What Lord of the Rings Male and Mood Do You Desire? brought to you by Quizilla ew.... T_T You're Sumeragi Subaru!Angst, betrayal, and perhaps large floating sakura petals seem to follow you everywhere. And yet, through all the psychological anguish that characterizes your life, you still manage to be so much prettier than everyone else. Don't trust tall,

2003-06-03T04:51:00.000-07:00

Are you alright? You probably hear that alot evenif you aren't depressed. Smile once in a while,it's not going to kill you. How do people see you? brought to you by Quizilla

2003-06-02T21:31:00.000-07:00

It is night and I find myself crying for help. My heart is failing me. I am begging all those who hear this tortured soul. I cannot move on... Not like this... I have dwelled upon the dark memories of late. The ones I dared not speak of. They have become the persistent voices in my head. The thoughts that torment me to no end. This is my curse. I beg you, help me... Save me from my

2003-05-29T04:02:00.000-07:00

Sorry if I haven't been posting. Ragnarok Online has gotten me addicted and I'm trying to step out of it. Someone claims he has fallen for me and I can't let it continue. I still love my angel... I am having a hard time with one of my friend after he has declared the intention of trying to win my love. He is selfish but so much like me. I let do such for I wanted to teach him a lesson. I don't

2003-05-14T03:30:00.000-07:00

005014003 1356 hours I am currently in my dentist's office while waiting for my mom. Minutes ago, I was contemplating whether I was going to send a "Happy Monthsary" greeting to my angel. But I just remembered... he did let go of me. That if I did greet him, it will not be welcomed. Maybe he truly meant to help me by letting me go. I confess, I loved him blindly. And I have regarded him more

2003-05-11T21:17:00.000-07:00

I had my first driving lesson today. I'm doing well... though I couldn't seem to estimate my distance from a car adjacent to me. I can't seem to turn back as much as possible. But the instructor is soooo annoying!!! He's flirting with me! Auuuggggggghhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! T_T And then the other day, my mom and I was in a jeepney and there was this maniac right beside me. He was trying to

2003-05-10T02:28:00.000-07:00

I baked some cookies today.... *sigh* Really... I've never felt so bored in my life. Tomorrow is Mother's Day and I haven't got any card for my mom. T_T I feel sooo helpless. I'm too depressed to post.... sorry.

2003-05-09T03:42:00.000-07:00

I'm tired after having my x-ray. My arms hurt. And I saw my angel again... And for the last time, I will be blessed with his kiss... a tender kiss I have looked for all my life... I love you dearest angel... Go back to heaven and think naught of me...

2003-05-08T19:26:00.000-07:00

I've written something last night. Hopefully it's doing well... I've poured most of my sorrow into this. I don't need arguments concerning this. Thess are my thoughts. Thoughts I have long buried within my soul. Thoughts I have not dared say. For I knew an argument caused by this isn't really going anywhere. I love you dearest angel... Freedom With You I stared at the night sky, pondering the

2003-05-08T07:05:00.000-07:00

It is 10:00 PM. My head is throbbing in pain... The ones I have wished to talk to have not come. It makes me feel so alone... I know they have a purpose for such but somewhat my heart bears an even heavier burden. When I was a child, my mom realized that I always looked for someone to play with. Someone to be with for the most of the day. But none of them seemed to be able to fulfill that

2003-05-08T02:53:00.000-07:00

I just had my tetanus and MMR shots today. And I am due for a fever break in five days. Kewlies... I found some really nice hilarious fics up www.fanfiction.net. There were some about Aragorn having a cold and Legolas struggling to keep him at bay. There's another that's plain crazy. T_T It's fun reading all these fics. :) Try it yourself. I'm trying my best to get some words out of my head. I

2003-05-07T06:16:00.000-07:00

It is SUCH a lousy, infuriating day. T_T Everything seemed like fine this morning then by the afternoon, everything else is crashing over me. Urgghh... Some stupid nun in St. Paul is putting me under probation. My mom postpones my papier tole appointment. And then she buys me a stupid wacoal bra? How lousy can you get! I just realized, my life has definitely no direction. And I'm not doing

2003-05-06T01:39:00.000-07:00

Today, the birthday of my angel, somewhat destroyed what little grip on sanity I had left. He let me go, to live my own life, without him in it. Angel, it is impossible for me to live without you. You've inspired me to be someone I can be... and yet you leave me like this... broken... almost lifeless. I love you beyond all reason yet this is what you give me. Freedom. Freedom from you. Can it

2003-05-03T19:18:00.000-07:00

005003003 2333 hours I can't get to sleep... My head hurts and I can barely see with my eyes. I might have to get some glasses. But my parents seem hesitant about letting me have a pair. Especially now when I'm starting to learn to drive. I had a hard time putting in the reverse gear... Oh well, no use putting it up in this blog when I'm not entirely good at this. Angel, how are you? I

2003-05-03T03:51:00.000-07:00

005003004 1735 hours It was Chloe's birthday yesterday and I didn't even send her a card or a letter at that. I miss her. Since she left for Japan, I have barely heard from her. Well, maybe she had forgotten about me since I wasn't exactly her best friend. *sigh* I've finished my work here in the office and I've got nothing else better to do. The papier tole pattern hahaue bought for me was

2003-05-01T04:50:00.000-07:00

005001003 1916 hours I am extremely upset when hahaue began giving me a really bad sermon concerning my satisfaction. Gods... does she actually think that I actually like being with them? Geez... how dense can she actually get? I want to be with my friends! I don't want to go with them... they're old and whiney... I hate their company And now I have to be the one to say sorry... T_T So I have

2003-04-30T06:29:00.000-07:00

It's night and I'm sooooooo bored. I've been on a streak of depression and it's not good for my health... I love you angel...

2003-04-28T21:41:00.000-07:00

Auggh.... I don't feel so good... I've got a lot of work to do and I'm running low on load... Sorry angel, no text for you for a while... Hey.. YOU OWE ME!!! hehehe Love yoU! As for now, nothing productive. I failed PLM Nursing and I'll be stuck at St. Paul. Great. Oh well, like I can do anything about it. Nothing much. Gotta go. Love you angel.

2003-04-25T21:59:00.000-07:00

004026003 1115 hours I am so frustrated. My angel is having fun with his stupid friends and I'm stuck here in this stupid office, working like some lousy secretary. THERE'S NO JUSTICE IN THIS WORLD!!! I hate them... They're bastards... Can't I just die? I am in despair... but my angel knows not and cares not of me... I hate this... Maybe I'll just kill myself. Goodbye forever...

2003-04-25T19:58:00.000-07:00

I am sooooooo sleepy. T_T There's no work today and we're not going out. Then my mom comes up and urging me to go to US. *sigh* I'm just too tired for anything... My mom is on the phone with my aunt. She's planning on how we'll be moving in in the US. T_T I'm not going... *sigh* I'm sooooo sleepy. Did I say that? There's nothing much to say. Just boredom... Urrghh.... Signing off.

2003-04-24T20:32:00.000-07:00

004025003 0900 hours I am at work. And at the moment, there's nothing to do. I'll have to wait for my mom to come back from the market. At least then, I can do something in the kitchen. Thanks for fixing up my blog sempai. Luv ya!!! ... I sound bored, don't I? Maybe I am. Laterz. I love you my dearest and loveliest angel...

2003-04-24T17:48:00.000-07:00

004025003 0035 hours We finished watching Johnny English earlier and just about to rest. My throat is itchy and a bit frustrating since my angel wasn't able to check my blog. Well mostly because of my foolish neglect. I wasn't able to give him the URL of my blog early enough. I am getting very sleepy and B'lanna Torres Paris is having some of those baby blues. Oyasumi. Suki da tenshi.

2003-04-24T07:31:00.000-07:00

There you go darling.. Just give me a shout if it doesn't pan out the way that it should. And gimme more links okay? And anyone elses blog that you want here? Take care always. Suki da twinstar. >>>ATHENA<<<

2003-04-24T00:39:00.000-07:00

There really isn't much happening today. My stupid brother is having a "meeting" in here and I've got not much room to put up some decent mp3's to listen to. They're putting up some group of programmers, hoping to be a big game company just like Squaresoft(r). My word for them? ISN'T THAT A LITTLE BIT TOO FARFETCHED? *sigh* Breathe. Ranting about some useless thing really won't help. I'm

2003-04-23T18:20:00.000-07:00

004023003 2310 hours It's pretty late but I can't seem to get myself to sleep. I set the tv to Discovery Channel just to pass the time... But at this moment, I think pondering can help me crawl into the Sandman's spell. We didn't go to the movies... My stupid brother thought that he can't come with us since he just had a little more than two hours. Didn't he even think that I wanted the movie

2003-04-23T01:50:00.000-07:00

004023003 1631 hours This blog was written on my brand new palm and am very much disoriented since I am lying down. Hope called me and she was congratulating me for having posted on this poor excuse of a blog. But somehow, I've grown fond of this blog thingie. I miss my dearest angel... He is so near yet I can't reach him... not to mention that he doesn't have any load right now. :-) I'll

2003-04-23T01:15:00.000-07:00

At last! PROGRESS!!! I cleaned my room. Though at this moment, it is still quite a mess. So much for trying. *sigh* The jellyfish sting looks horrible on my hand. Looks like I'm gonna have some scales for a few months. Urrghh... and the one that stung me was a Portugeuse Man-Of-War. Good thing it was a baby though. If it were an older one, I prolly won't be here posting. *breathes deeply* I

2003-04-22T04:17:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning with a really bad headache. It was 6:30 AM and I was being told to get up and get ready for an x-ray. And that morning, I found out that I had no fresh clean clothes in the closet. >_< Really bad... The previous night was a blast. It was Noey's 18th birthday, her debut at that. And I was there, prolly since she invited me. And no offense to Noey if she reads this, I was

2003-03-29T02:45:00.000-08:00

This morning, I had the worst waking of my life. Perhaps it was all just a dream but it was certainly horrible... My angel wishes to be at my side but fate permits us not. Then I must endure this deathly sickness in humble loneliness. Must I suffer? I find no actual point on dwelling on this matter since I still have to wait. But I just feel like it. I don't know how to rant. So this blog's

2003-03-28T03:50:00.000-08:00

This is an opening? Hmm... I'm currently sick right now and in need of rest. But I willingly deprive myself of it. I am about to enter college life and there's prolly nothing I can see from where I stand. Prolly coz I'm not very interested. I'm still blinded by so much stuff in front of me. Perhaps love and career? Hmm... This is just a trial anyway. Not a real post. I love my dearest